I started a math class for my master's degree on Monday. We adjusted the schedule that day so that we could be done before July 4th weekend. As a class, we voted to begin class at 8:30 and end at noon, instead of going 9:00 - 11:45, which was the original scheduled time. Well, I went home and didn't look at my notes, and put 9:00 in my calendar. So for the last 2 days in a row, I have been 1/2 hour late for class. Both days when I have come in, there has been discussion about classroom issues going on. Things like, "This division algorithm seems really complicated to me. How would I explain it to 7th graders?" Things that aren't math. So I didn't realize I was coming in late, because it seemed to me class hadn't started yet.
The teacher for this class is also my thesis advisor. I had spent some hours on my thesis problem and wasn't sure about how I was doing, so I emailed him asking if he could stay after class to read what I had and tell me if I was on the right track. He didn't respond to my email. So yesterday after class I asked if he received my email. He said yes, but he was acting very strangely... he wouldn't look me in the eye, and his words were terse. He said we could talk about it and we both sat down. Then he says, "The thing is, you have to start showing up on time." I said I thought I was on time. He told me class started at 8:30. I'm quite certain my horror was obvious on my face. I apologized, and his response to my apology was, "You voted on the time change." I said I put the wrong time in my calendar, and I would make sure to be on time. I've been in this master's program for 2 years now. I've rarely been late or absent for any of my classes. It seems to me this is a forgivable offense. Anyway, I got out my thesis notebook and showed him what I had been doing. I said, "This is my restatement of the problem, and this is what I have so far." Bear in mind, I had told him in the email that I needed to know if I was on the right track, and he said he received my email. So he looks at what I have on the first page, and without bothering to turn the page and see the rest of it, he says, "So what is your question?" And he didn't say it nicely. I said, "I just need to know whether I am on the right track." I turned the page so he could see what I had written about how to solve the problem, and this is what he says to me: "Why did you write all this stuff?" Well, I was done with him at that point. I can't remember the time when I felt more stupid than at that moment. I said, "That is what I was thinking when I was trying to figure out how the problem was constructed." I must have conveyed my anger and desire to flee, because he finally lightened up and started talking to me about how to approach the problem. I listened to what he said, offered no more of my own thoughts, and thanked him. I got up and apologized again for my mistake with the starting time, and again my apology went unacknowledged.
So, even though I really love the things we are doing in class, I don't want to go. My feelings are hurt. I made a mistake... I see no reason why he should be possessed to be so rude and unkind to me. All I can do is apologize and fix the mistake. The worst part is that the next time I need help with my thesis problem, it will be exceedingly difficult to approach him. I doubt I will be able to bring myself to do it. I want nothing to do with him. Maybe given some time, I will feel better about the situation... I hope so... because it's a fucking THESIS and I might need some fucking HELP.
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